Wheezy Waiter is NAKED!
|"Wheezy Waiter is NAKED!"|
|Original Upload date||April 1, 2010|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||seesarahgo|
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[Black screen. After a moment, the blackness starts to minimize as the image grows larger on the screen. A vacuum/whooshing noise can be heard as blackness recedes.]
[Craig talks to himself] Man, I can't believe I sucked us into a black hole and killed us all. That's the last time I punch my fist into my fist. It's alright. I was getting sick of making those stupid videos... [sees camera] Hey, we're back! And I'm wearing different clothes. Is this a different dimension? Huh. You probably didn't experience the black hole because I make my videos three years in the future and upload them in the past. So three years from now, we're gonna be in a black hole for a day. Sorry about that.
What should I do now that I'm back?
Ooh! I know! [pounds fists together. There's an explosion.] Don't do that anymore. It's just so fun, though. Hmm. [pounds fists together again. explosion] Whoops. No more.
So yesterday right before the intro I said this... [clip from yesterday's video:] Now that I have some privacy, I can do the naked yoga.
And then I actually did do naked yoga but it was during the intro so you didn't see it. And I've been thinking about this. I don't want to deny you my naked yoga time. So click here [holds up RSS pillow which has a clickable annotation over it] to see the footage of my naked yoga time. It's on my alternate channel. Go right ahead. You'll be directed right back to this video.
Today, of course, is April 2nd. And this day in history... April fools! It's April 1st. Which is known as April Fools Day in many countries across the world. The day that it is socially acceptable to lie to each other.
[turns to alternate camera angle] I have 11 toes. And no tongue. April fools. [turns back to main camera angle]
Did you know that in 1979 Iran declared April 1st Republic Day? Many still mistake that to be a joke.
[turns to alternate camera angle] I'm dying. April fools. We're all dying. [turns back to main camera angle]
At Google's New York City office, on April 1st 2007, an e-mail went out to all employees that a ball python escaped from an engineer's cubicle. This turned out to be not a prank. But I have my doubts. April fools. I believe it.
[turns to alternate camera angle] I'm pregnant. April fools. I had an abortion. [turns back to main camera angle]
I think the coffee's done. April fools. It's not done yet.
[turns to alternate camera angle] Oh wow! I love what you've done with your hair. April fools. It's ugly. [turns back to main camera angle]
Okay, now the coffee's done. I love it when the coffee's done! Floor slide to the coffee! [Throws himself on the floor to slide but doesn't slide. Lying on his stomach on the floor] It didn't work. Uh... hehe... April fools. [gets up. There's a cracking sound as he falls into the whale tank] Oh my god! A shark! Don't eat me! [whale sounds] Oh... good costume, whale. You got me.
[Viewer winks but it honks instead of dings. She winks the other eye and it dings.]
[Wheezy Waiter sunglasses outro]
[Craig comes out of kitchen with the coffee, edges his way around the whale tank. Sits and raises his coffee cup. Goes to take a sip.] Hehe.... Alright, you probably figured out there's no coffee in here. April fools. [Tips the coffee cup. Coffee pours onto his lap.] Oops.
The clickable annotation for Craig's naked yoga time leads to Wheezy Does Naked Yoga.
The beginning of this video relates to the previous day's video called Fist Collider.
Wheezy Waiter is NAKED! on YouTube