Wheezy Waiter Goes Bananas

From Wheezy Wiki

Video

Transcript

[slides in/singing rug] Hey.
[Clone leans in from kitchen:] Hey.
[Clone leans in from bed:] Hey beardlovers.
[Craig hits a key on the toy piano.]
[slides in/singing rug] Hey.
[Clone leans in from kitchen:] Hey.
[Clone leans in from bed:] Hey beardlovers.
[Craig hits a key on the toy piano.]
[slides in/singing rug] Hey.
[Clone leans in from kitchen:] Hey.
[Clone leans in from bed:] Hey beardlovers.
[Craig hits a key on the toy piano.]
So. That was rhythmic and interesting. Start the intro.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
So today I wanted to talk... What the heck is THAT? [Zooms in camera. Dramatic music. Craig focuses camera. Top of fridge is visible.] There's bananas on top of my fridge.
[plays guitar and sings]
They're bananas, bananas,
They're sitting on my fridge.
Bananas, bananas,
They look just like a bridge. [Craig holds up a banana. A picture of a bridge is dissolved over it to show their similarity]
Bananas, bananas,
You can throw them on the floor. [Throws banana on the floor]
Bananas, bananas,
You can not throw them on the floor. [Moves his arm as if he's going to throw them on the floor but stops himself]
Or you can eat them. [Craig puts an unpeeled banana into his mouth]
I'm not gonna eat them, though.
I'm not hungry.
[song over]
Oh Wheezy Waiter, he's so random!
Well, bananas are now my thing.
[picture of a gorilla] Harumph!
No they're mine!
[Picture of a chimp. Chimp sounds.]
No they're mine, ape!
[Breathes in and out rapidly in extreme closeup]
Now I'm gonna handstand until my wallet falls out.
[walks towards wall] Whoa, grab my wallet. [Grabs wallet from nightstand]
[Does a handstand. Cuts to Craig still doing a handstand but it's dark out now. Wallet falls out. Handstand over.]
Whoa! The shiny light is now shining darkness everywhere, making it dark.
I should be a scientist.
That was a long handstand, huh? Huh? Huh? Huh! [Nodding]
Oh crap! I gotta finish my video and upload it. What do I have so far? [leans towards computer] I sang a song about bananas? That's both stupid and dumb.
Hmm. As a method of procrastination, let's look up what's popular in music today so I don't have to get things done. [leans towards computer]
Let's see. Which one should I go to? Ahh, definitive top ten list of music that is awesome right now in the world dot com. It's my favorite one. [Clicks computer]
Whaaa...? The banana song's number one? [Points to monitor, where we can see web page entitled "Definitive Top Ten List of Music That is Awesome Right Now in the World. #1 Bananas Bananas.] I'm huge! Looks like I'll get a chance to wear this vest someday. [Tugs on vest that is hanging by his computer.] People are listening to me all over the world. In a montage sort of way. Cue montage.
[The Bananas song begins to play.]
They're bananas, bananas,
They're sitting on my fridge. [A black and white phot of family in the 50s gathered around a TV that is playing Craig's Bananas song]
Bananas, bananas,
They look just like a bridge. [The video is playing in Times Square]
Bananas, bananas, You can throw them on the floor. [Steve Jobs holds a thin computer that is playing Craig's video on the screen]
Bananas, bananas, You can not throw them on the floor. [Closeup of a photo of Reese Witherspoon. The video is playing on her forehead.]
[Back in Craig's apartment]
Wow, this feels really good. Yet somehow it feels like destiny. Except for being on Reese Witherspoon's forehead. I didn't expect that. Although it is huge.
Alright, davidvlogs, give me a wink, but make it with light. Well, all video is made with light but you know what I mean.
[Viewer-submitted wink with light (ding), outro music, logo, and human wink (ding)]
Harumph! Harumph! Harumph!
Huh? Huh? Huh?

Recurring elements

singing rug, clone, beardlovers, song, breathing being his thing, handstand, wallet falls out, wink, outtakes

Related videos

In 2011, Craig made a follow-up to this video called Wheezy Goes More Bananas.

External links

Wheezy Waiter Goes Bananas on YouTube