|Original Upload date||August 22, 2011|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||MikuProjectOcarina|
[slides in/singing rug]
Hey beardlovers. I'm glad you're here. Uh.... 'cause there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about. I'm.... this... I'm... I'm really nervous... I wanted to profess my undying love... for Michael Bolton. [picture of Michael Bolton appears onscreen] [Craig sings:] When a man loves Michael Bolton, can't sing the original lyrics to this song. 'Cause despite beautiful, long curly flowing blonde hair that he had in the 90s, Michael Bolton's a guy. [stops singing] So you see my predicament here.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
No, don't worry. My love for Michael Bolton doesn't interfere with my love for Scarlett Johansson. [picture of Scarlett Johansson appears] There's room in my heart for both Scarlett Johansson and Scarlett Johansson. [picture of Michael Bolton disappears] What was I talking about?
Movin' on. Today's August 22nd, Monday.
[A clone extends a bottle of sunscreen into frame:] Can I bring sunscreen?
[Clone leans into frame holding the sunscreen:] If we're gonna be moving, we're gonna go outside. We should probably have sunscreen.
[Craig:] No, I said "moving on." To the next subject.
[Clone:] Oh. [pauses] Is the new subject outside?
[Clone:] Oh. [Back out of frame]
[Craig:] Alright, so. It's Monday. The beginning of the work week. They say Sunday's the beginning of the week but let's be serious, Monday's the beginning of the week. It's when you actually start doing...
[Clone extends a dumbbell into frame:] Perhaps some weights will help?
[Clone:] Well, if everyone's gonna start being weak, we should probably exercise. So we stay strong. So we can protect ourselves.
[Craig:] No, week. W-e-e-k. The length of time?
[Clone:] Oh. [pauses] Well, will you be doing any exercise this week?
[Craig:] No. You know how lazy I am.
[Craig turns to camera.]
Anyway, speaking of work week, I used to make videos every weekday on this channel and lately I've been slacking. I've been skipping days...
[The clone extends a shoe into frame:] Better make sure to wear the proper footwear if you're gonna be skipping. You don't want to hurt your...
[Craig jumps out of his chair:] No! No! I'm not talking about skipping around like this [starts skipping in place and keeps skipping while talking]. I'm talking about skipping days making videos. Okay? Sometimes words have different meanings, misunderstanding overly helpful clone!
[Clone:] It looks like you're skipping now. If you go outside, you better bring some sunscreen.
[Craig:] No! Get out! Just get out! [Clone backs out of frame]
So anyway, in the next coming weeks, I'm gonna try to make videos more often and stay home, not travel so much. [whale sounds] What's that, whale? My pet whale's trying to say something. [more whale sounds] You're reminded of a joke? Let's hear it. Where do you weigh whales? I don't know. Where? The whale weigh station? Oh. Hahahahaha. Whale weigh station.
[Speech impediment guy:] I don't undoestand, Wheezy Waitoe.
Yeah, you wouldn't get it, speech impediment clone. But that was a good one, whale. You're too much. Too much, whale.
[A clone singing a song can be heard:] Hush little baby, don't say a word. [There's a clone sitting behind Craig singing.] Momma's gonna buy...
[Craig:] What are you doing?
[Misunderstanding overly helpful clone:] I'm singing to your baby who's been crying.
[Craig:] I don't have a baby...
[Misunderstanding overly helpful clone:] Too much crying.
[Craig:] Too much crying? Too much... whale... Too much wail? I was refer... I was talking to my pet whale! No, there's no crying... AUGH! That's a horrible pun! Ugh! I'm outta here! [Gets up and run towards kitchen.] Ugh!! [Jumps in the alligator pit. Alligator munches.]
[The Craig with the guitar strums and turns to camera.] Heh. I love messing with clones. They can only take so many puns. I'm the real Craig. Or am I? [dramatic zoom and dun dun dun music] I am. I'm sure. Pretty sure.
[Viewer-submitted outro theme and wink (ding)]
[Craig sits with a picture of Michael Bolton onscreen to his right and a picture of Scarlett Johansson onscreen to his left.] This is like a really weird conscience thing I have going on right now. This is... [points to Scarlett's picture] my sinful side. And this represents [points to Bolton] my... constip... constipated side?
This is the first appearance of Misunderstanding overly helpful clone.
Wheezy, Interrupted on YouTube