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WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 644
Original Upload date May 7, 2012
Running time 0:03:06
Intro Wheezy beard intro
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Episode chronology
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"I'm Still Here"
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"Super Earth"


Transcript (in progress)

Previously on Wheezy Waiter...
Okay. Remember the meteor was plummeting towards Earth, meteor-repelling laser was gone, Corporate Clone took charge and inspired a bunch of clones to stop the meteor using Quiet Clone's ability to cause earthquakes while singing. Clone in Love wanted to get involved and rushed over to Wheezy Waiter's house. He claimed to have seen something crazy on the way there that he wants to show Wheezy Waiter. And now, for even more of the time when the meteor was coming at us and other stuff might be happening on Earth.
- So what you're telling me, Clone in Love, is that... Do you have another name besides Clone in Love? What do you call yourself?
- Well, actually, the love of my life... likes to call me ...
- I'll just call you Clone in Love then. So what you're telling me is you saw a bunch of clones carrying some futuristic device into a rocket on a rooftop?
- It wasn't a rocket. It was a spaceship. And it was... There! That's where it was! Right there!
- There's nothing there.
- But it was right there.
- Love is blind. No, that's not right, 'cause you're seeing things. Love is likely a badly rendered video game. No, it's like a... an acid trip. No, love is like when you see a bunch of clones going onto a rocket carrying a futuristic device on top of a roof when they're not there. No. I'm gonna go with acid trip.
- I'm not blinded by love.
- I know. I just said it was an acid trip.
- Listen, I know what I saw. I have pictures.
- They're carrying the meteor-repelling laser! They stole it! And who are they? They're a bunch of clones. We already have a bunch of clones going into space to stop the meteor. And they should be there in about... a few days. Huh. I don't even remember there being that many clones alive.
- Come on. We have to check it out.
- Yeah, you're right. After lunch... Oh. Now.
- Wow. I can't believe we made it. It was awesome when you knocked out those two security guards. Good thing they had the same measurements as us...
- Yeah.
- So we could wear their clothes and then quickly change back into our own when we came out here.
- Yeah. Anyway, let's see if there's any clues...
- And that woman asked me how my wife was doing, and I told her that she died in a Tilt-A-Whirl accident. Hehe.
- I can't believe she believed you. Anyway, we gotta...
- I know. Because the fair isn't until June, right? Unless she's thinking about the one up in Skokie. I believe that's going on right now. But the cotton candy up there is, like, two dollars more.
- Mm hmm. So... what were they doing?
- I don't know what they're doing that makes it more expensive up in Skokie. I certainly can't afford it. Not on a security guard's pension. I wanna enjoy my old age.
- Okay. Focus. Don't you want to know what's going on?
- Yeah!
- I mean about the clones.
- Oh. Meh.
- But the world might end!
- But we already got plenty of clones working on that.
- We didn't know about the clones that were here. How do we know they're on our side?
- Well, they certainly looked very innocent and awesome to me.
- What if they fail? What if it's not enough?
- Maybe I'd rather spend my last days on Earth doing what I love. You have someone at home waiting for you. Maybe you should do what you love too.
- Inappropriate.
- You know what I mean. Be with the one you love during these end times. You're lucky enough to have her.
- You think that was luck? I didn't lay around waiting for her. I had to fight for her.
- Well, also, not everyone is blessed with such good looks.
- Just like I'm gonna fight to enjoy her love for years to come. And for everyone to love. Men to love women. Women to love men. Men to love men. Turtles to love turtles. Men to love turtles.
- Okay, you're very open about this, and that's good, but I'm not like you. I thought this was fun for a while, but I'm going home. What was that? This feels metallic. What is this building anyway?
- I think it's a children's hospital.
- Oh, it's good that they have places for those things.
- Kids?
- Yeah. That stuff. Anyway, there's metal down here, and it's covered in dirt.
- Let's clear it away.
- Okay. You do that while I go upload this video so people are informed.
- Okay. Thanks for the help?
- You're welcome.
- Wait a second. I think I know what this is. It looks just like a...

Recurring elements

[Coming soon]

External links

Unearthing on YouTube