Tour de Beard 7: Tucson

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"Tour de Beard 7: Tucson"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 202
Original Upload date October 7, 2009
Running time 0:02:38
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Outro website/youtube outro
Wink submitted by literallythejoy
Great People
Guests: Matt Weber
Sam Grant
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Tour de Beard 6: San Diego"
Next →
"Tour de Beard 8: Las Vegas"



Hey beardlovers.
Let's travel back in time to this morning and take a look at our beards. [DPC song plays while Matt, Justin, Craig, and Sam do their profiles and look straight at the camera to document their beard growth. They're standing on the beach. After doing his poses, Sam takes off running across the beach towards the water, carrying his sleeping mat.]
[Sam:] Swimming! Yay!
[sign that says Surfing Only]
[Sam:] Nope. [He runs back towards camera, throwing his sleeping mat into the air.]
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
We're in the Arizona desert traveling to Tucson. And I've ben wondering [shows side of highway] where the *ding* are the cacti?
We've been listening to a lot of Spanish talk radio. [Spanish talk radio plays.]
[Justin:] This guy doesn't know what he's talking about.
[Craig:] "Pero." That means, um, "but." "Tiempo." That means "time."
[Justin:] So there's something going on with a butt. And it happens in a certain amount of time.
[Craig:] "But" B-U-T.
[Justin:] Oh. Alright. Well, that could be anything.
It's pretty fun.
So... what's up? What else is going on?
Some of you are wondering about what happened to the wookiee at the beginning of the tour. Well, it came his turn to drive, and he didn't want to. He was being a real baby about it. Then he got up and ran off, never to be seen again. I'm gonna miss him. [Chewbacca cries out.] He's still here.
[looking behind him] When are you gonna drive, *pants*hole?
Hey Justin, do you have any knowledge for today?
[Justin:] I don't know jack*shirt* about Arizona. Nobody does. You're welcome.
Since our band is traveling in two cars, we try to maintain a sense of camaraderie by listening to the same radio stations. ["I Gotta Feeling" by Black Eyed Peas plays. Craig and Justin do fist pumps out the windows of the Fiesta. Ahead of them, Matt and Sam's arms are fist-bumping out the windows of the Aveo.] And sometimes we just try to look at each other. [shot of Matt staring and smiling at them from passenger seat of Aveo]
So tonight we're playing in Tucson at the Hangart, which is an airport hangar. And tomorrow we're playing in Vegas at the Bunkhouse. That show was set up by Bill, aka doctornoise, and his band Searchlight is playing too. Thanks Bill.
It's winking time. [Dings can be heard coming from inside the car] What's that? [looking behind him] Stop winking! [Chewbacca cries out]
[Viewer-submitted wink (ding)] [Many winks (many dings)]
[ outro]
[Title on screen: Tucson, AZ]
[Matt:] So then they go to Venice Italy.... umm... to find the secret catacombs.
[Sam:] Yeah.
[Matt:] ... and goes to a library which used to be a church. It was a church that converted to...
[Sam:] Were there any... were there... uh.. any gondolas involved at all?
[Matt:] Uh, no, there weren't any gondolas.
[Sam:] That's really weird.
[Matt:] Yeah, that was one of my biggest critiques...
[Sam:] Duck.
[Matt ducks. The sleeping mat flies in low. Sam catches it. Matt stands up straight again.]
[Matt:] I mean, that was one of my biggest critiques of the entire documentary.
[Sam:] Yeah.
[Matt:] But one thing you can take away from it is x always marks the spot.
[Sam:] What? Why?

Recurrring elements

Driftless Pony Club (DPC), tour video, beardlovers, beard growth check on Tour de Beard, Sam throwing sleeping mat, *ding*, Chewbacca, *pants*, *shirt*, wink


This is the first use of *pants* to censor the word "ass."

External links

Tour de Beard 7: Tucson on YouTube