Tour de Beard 10: Portland

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"Tour de Beard 10: Portland"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 205
Original Upload date October 12, 2009
Running time 0:03:02
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Outro website/youtube outro
Wink submitted by Morgan (flawedartist)
Great People
Camera work by Craig Benzine
Matt Weber
Guests: Matt Weber
Sam Grant
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Tour de Beard 9: San Francisco"
Next →
"Tour de Beard 11: Seattle"



[Title on screen: Yesterday Morning]
[Title on screen: San Francisco]
[Sam:] I love Portland! [throws sleeping mat]
[Matt:] Not so fast there, Nutter Butter. We're going to Arcata before we go to Portland.
[Sam:] Aren't we technically going to Blue Lake that's right outside of Arcata?
[Matt:] Well, yeah... Why'd you throw it to Portland then?
[Sam:] I love Portland.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
Hey beardlovers. Beard check. [DPC song plays while Craig, Justin, Sam do their profiles and look straight at the camera to document their beard growth.]
[Matt walks up to Sam during his beard check:] Hey! You trimmed your beard! [slaps/shoves Sam out of the way]
[Matt does his profiles and looks straight to camera. Sam tackles him and they go out of frame.]
I'm happy to see that a number of you won the contest and saw the misspelling of "Driftless" in the last video. [shot of title: Created by Driftess Pony Club] We're trying to celebrate Christmas early so we put no L in Driftless. Okay, I *ding*ed up.
We're on our way from Blue Lake California to Portland, where we're playing tonight. Unfortunately, along the way, we had to make a pit stop. At the moon of Endor. To say goodbye to an old friend.
[Craig sitting in car, sighs:] See those redwoods over there? It's time.
[Justin sighs:] Do we have to?
[Craig:] We have to.
[Craig and Justin slowly turn and look behind them.]
[In woods, Chewbacca cries out as he looks down on Sam, Justin, and Craig. Camera is from his point of view.]
[Craig:] No. No, you can't come with us. You have to help the Ewoks destroy the shield generator so the rebels can destroy the Death Star.
[Chewbacca cries out]
[Sam:] And we have to play a show in Portland.
[Chewbacca speaks again.]
[Justin:] No, no Chewie. We already hugged you once. You don't need to step into frame.
[Chewbacca nods while speaking.]
[Craig:] No, you have to go. Just go.
[Chewbacca speaks.]
[Sam:] I love you.
[Chewbacca nods again, speaks.]
[Craig:] Go. [waves him away] Go on.
[Chewbacca turns and walks away. Turns back to see Craig, Justin, and Sam waving goodbye.]
[Craig:] Where's Matt? He should be here for this.
[Sam:] He was too upset.
[Matt is sitting in the car playing with a handheld Nintendo/Gameboy/something or other:] Yeah! Firepower!
[Chewbacca calls out as he turns from the guys waving goodbye and continues his walk into woods]
[Craig chokes back tears. Justin shakes and lowers his head.]
[Sam:] WHYYYYYYY??????!!!!!!!!
[Sam gets into the car. Matt is still playing the Nintendo.]
[Matt:] Hey. Did Chewie leave already? [Sam is crying]
[Sam:] Yeah.
[Matt:] He owes me five bucks.
[Sam pounds steering wheel in grief.]
[Matt:] *ding*
Before we left, we decided to hop on some speeder bikes real quick. [sped-up footage of traveling through the woods with sound of speeder bike]
[Craig making the speeder bike sound with his mouth. Sees camera and stops in surprise.] Oh hi. [waves]
[Morgan winks (ding)]
[ outro]
[Title on screen: Ash Street Saloon. Portland, OR]
[Matt:] Endor's the planet.
[Sam:] Yeah?
[Matt:] Ewoks live on the forest moon of Endor.
[Sam:] Oh. Forest on a moon. That's kinda weird.
[Matt:] It's cool but Endor isn't the planet that they live on.
[Sam catches the sleeping mat]
[Sam:] I love Portland!
[Matt:] How did you catch that in the club?
[Sam:] I love Portland.
[Matt:] Oh.
[Sam gets up and leaves. Matt lies down.]

Recurring elements

Driftless Pony Club (DPC), tour video, Sam throwing sleeping mat, beardlovers, beard growth check on Tour de Beard, *ding*, Chewbacca, wink

External links

Tour de Beard 10: Portland on YouTube