[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[Craig in the passenger seat of a car, singing along with someone:] Stick your head in the microwave and give yourself a tan, ooo, doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, dare to be stupid!
[looks at camera] Hi beardlovers. You caught us in the middle of being stupid. [holding his hand up to window] Check it out. My hand moves as fast as trees. Yeah.
[Sam sticks his hand into frame, in front of Craig's face.]
[Craig:] That's Sam's hand. We're both in a band together called Driftless Pony Club. And we're on tour. We're on our way to Minneapolis to pick up our touring drummer.
Brought along the essentials for the tour. Peanuts [holds up a big jar of peanuts], Sun Chips [holds up a bag of Sun Chips], empty bottle of V8 Splash [holds up empty bottle of V8 Splash], and... [Chewbacca cries out. Craig looks behind him, then to Sam.} Sam, did you pack the wookiee?
[Craig:] What did I tell you? The wookiee hates Minnesota. [Chewbacca calls out again] See?
So I'm gonna try to upload a video every day of our tour. Our first show is tomorrow night in Omaha. [Sam's hand enters the frame again.] For more details about our tour, link's in the doobly-doo. Sam's hand, could you point to it? [Sam's hand points to it] [Chewbacca calls out again. Craig turns around to look behind him. Sam's hand also turns.]
[Viewer-submitted wink (ding)]
[wheezywaiter.com youtube.com/wheezywaiter outro]
[outtakes:] Wait... My hand is moving as fast as this tree. Oh, truck! *shirt*
song, beardlovers, Driftless Pony Club (DPC), tour video, Chewbacca, doobly-doo, outtakes, *shirt*
Tour de Beard 1 on YouTube