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WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 659
Original Upload date June 21, 2012
Running time 0:02:37
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Wink submitted by HeyItsKatiee95
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Big Time"
Next →
"No, I Did Tell You"


Transcript (in progress)

Hey breadlovers. I mean beardlovers.
Today is June 20 Durst. I mean first. Gah! I can't talk today. Why can't I talk today? Let's figure it out through the magic of cashback. I mean flashback. I'm keeping my money.
So... I choked up in my own room. No, I mean I woke up in my own room.
Then I walked into the living broom.
- Hey! I'm sweeping here!
Oops. I mean the living room. Then I walked into the brining room.
I've fallen into a vat of meat soaking in liquid!
I mean dining room and went to the cupboard where I keep my serial killer. I mean cereal.
Then I grabbed my cereal and went to my Chicago River bridge.
I mean my Chicago silver fridge. So I could grab my coy silk.
Why is it always hiding? I guess I have to wear polyester.
Oops. I mean my soy milk.
Oh. There it is.
And then I sat down on my flare.
Oh god! Oh it burns! Ohhhh!
I mean chair. Then I proceeded to enjoy my protesting.
Save the whales!
I mean ingesting of food. Then I realized my soft knee was done.
So soft.
I mean coffee. Then I said, I love it when the coffee is buns.
I mean done. And I shrank it.
I mean drank it. And then my ankles got kind of cold so naturally I decided to pull up the John Hancock.
Oops. I mean my long man socks. Then I went to the Ba'ath Room.
- He's still alive?
Oops. I mean bathroom. Then I practiced sentimental prayer.
Love. Newborn babies.
Oops. I mean proper dental care.
Then I put on my beans. I... I mean jeans.
And that's when an egg started telling me what to do. It was really weird. It said that I should...
- Sweep the floor! And it wasn't an egg. It was me. Craig. And you didn't wake up in your own room. You woke up in the clone room. I made you to do the chores. I must have screwed up the speech patterns somehow. But sweep the kitchen!
- Halfway.
- No, the whole way!
- I meant to say Okay.
- Good.
- *Ding* you.
- What?!
- Umm... Luck coup. I... There has been a coup of luck in my life because I get to do chores for you. I meant to say *Ding* you.
- Why are you still sitting there?
- Nothing.
[Wheezy Waiter]
- Cheers.
Love. Kittens. Newborn babies. Moonlight. Reflecting off the wet sand on an ocean beach. Reminds me of you.

Recurring elements

[Coming soon]

External links

Tidal on YouTube