|"The Crying Game"|
|Original Upload date
April 22, 2010|
Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by
[Craig is in the kitchen. Sees the camera]
Oh, hey beardlovers. Oop! My clones forgot to put the whale tank cover on. Alright. [Jumps and flies through the air and lands in his chair] Aaa! Ooo! Aaa! Wind burn. [Craig's face turns red. Really really red.] Wind burn! [winces]
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
Guess what? It's time for another edition of...
[Many Craig voices say the name of this segment as Craig points to the words that appear one by one on screen as a title:] Wheezy Waiter is Stoopid... uh, Stoopid! [audience laughter and applause]
So in yesterday's video I said this. [black and white clip from yesterday's video:] Scarlett Johansson, [The word "idiot" appears on screen with an arrow pointing to Craig] widower of the late Ryan Reynolds.
What I meant to say was 'widow.' A widower would be a man. Scarlett Johansson is a man? [looks disgusted] Eww ugh ugh!
I don't have the internet right now. I can't be expected to remember everybody who's a man or a woman or a dog. For a while yesterday, I thought Diane Sawyer was a dog's name. Sorta sounds like a dog. [as if he's calling a dog] Here, Diane Sawyer! [whistles] Here, Diane Sawye... Okay, not at all.
I don't even know why I'm telling you about my mistake. Not many of you noticed. [shows a page full of comments pointing out his mistake] It's just one innocent mistake. It's not that big of a dea... [fights back tears] a dea... [whimpers] a deal. [starts sobbing. Turns on radio. Sad music starts. He sobs. He reaches for his yellow cup, takes water out of it and splashes it onto his eyes] Why am I so stupid? [Cries]
[Title on screen: 3 hours later] [Craig is still crying] I can't... I can't keep crying like this. I'm gonna dehydrate. What should I do? Should I drink this water? [holds up yellow cup and a clickable annotation for 'Drink water' appears over it] Should I drink this water? Should I go do my clones' chores? [A clickable annotation for 'Do clones' chores' appears over the kitchen] Take my mind off of it. Which one should I do? Should I...? Pick one. [whale sounds] See, my whale's even upset now. [Keeps crying] Which one is it? Better hurry or I'm gonna dehydrate. Fine. Not gonna pick? I guess I'll just dehydrate and die now. [The annotations disappear and Craig falls out of his chair onto the floor.] Now I'm dead. Thanks a lot.
[A clickable annotation appears on screen: Click here to try again]
beardlovers, whale tank, Wheezy Waiter is Stupid, Scarlett Johansson, comments, interactive video
The previous day's video, in which Craig makes the 'widower' mistake, is How to Read.
The Crying Game on YouTube