Someone is Missing

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"Someone is Missing"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 606
Original Upload date January 11, 2012
Running time 0:03:22
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Wink submitted by SiriuslyLoony7
Featured Clones
Episode chronology
← Previous
"The Most Honest Video Ever"
Next →
"The Wigged Man"



[slides in/singing rug]
Hey beardlovers. Today's Wednesday. The middle of the week. Also known as Hump Day. Hahahaha! Grow up!
Listen, I don't like it. Wednesday means it's the middle of the work week so you're all thinky about the two days of work you did and then the two that you have to do. Thankfully, I love my job. But not everybody loves their job. This guy doesn't love his job. [picture of a frowning redhead] Probably. Let's figure out a way to make Wednesday awesome. So let's try something called EXPLOSION Wednesday in which EXPLOSIONS happen a a lot.
Everyone loves EXPLOSIONS as long as no one gets hurt and nothing of value is destroyed. If you don't love EXPLOSIONS then that's really great. I hear the weather is nice this time of year in Prudeville. Partly cloudy with 78 percent chance of [raspberry]. I do this for a living.
But for the rest of us, we're gonna give Explosion Wednesday a try. See if we should make it a thing or not. And I bet all those EXPLOSIONS will make you happy. They make this guy happy. [Picture of frowning redhead] EXPLOSION! [Picture is replaced by picture of smiling brunette] See, look! He turned into a super successful businessman with clean teeth who just doesn't know why he's happy! And that's amazing that he's so happy considering his situation. No cufflinks. Life sucks with no cufflinks! Walking around, cuffs unlinked. Did we do the intro yet? It's been a while. We should probably do the intro. Let's do the intro.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
So what was I talking about? Oh yeah, no cufflinks. Augh, I hate no cufflinks! One time I had no cufflinks. I almost killed a man. Killed him dead! But I didn't kill him dead. I... I killed him hurt. He just... so he was hurt, not dead. No murder here. Hehe.
So in the news, [shows headline] Ford recalling 450,000 minivans, SUVs. [reads from article] for risks from FIRE and loss of power.
Oh that's just like you, isn't it? Just give us something we like and then take it away. [starts getting tearful. A clone emerges from the bathroom.]
[Clone:] Is everything okay? You seem a bit upset.
[Craig:] I'm fine. [He's not fine.] EXPLOSION!
[Clone:] You can't explode your way out of this way, buddy. What's the matter?
[Craig, crying:] I just don't like Hump Day. Ahaha! Grow up! [sobs]
[Clone:] It's never bothered you this much before. What's really going on?
[Craig:] Alright, fine, clone. If you must know, Craig with a Wig's missing.
[Clone:] Who?
[Craig gasps:] You don't know who Craig with a Wig is? He's my friend. He sits in the kitchen. Remember?
[Ripple effect to Craig with a Wig at the kitchen table:] I hate all things. Yay. [He turns his head as his theme song plays:] He's Craigity Craig, Craig with a Wig. [He smiles. Toy piano key.]
[Ripple effect back to present]
[Clone:] I still don't know what you're talking about.
[Craig:] Now the chair's empty.
[Shot of empty chair. Theme song plays with different words:] He's Craigity Craig. Craig without a Craig. [toy piano key]
[Clone:] So you're saying he pretty much just looks like you with a wig?
[Craig:] Yeah.
[Clone:] I'm gonna go find him. Sounds like quite an adventure. [Clone walks to front door and leaves.]
I can't finish the video today, guys. Too upset. So I'll just slap this on here. [Title onscreen: To be continued...]
And here's some new t-shirt designs for ya. There's a link in the doobly-doo.
[Gets teary again.] Craig with a Wig used to wear t-shirts. [Sobs and words fly from his mouth: gah hhuh uh] And a wig. And my friendship. [Sobs]
[Wheezy Waiter outro]
[A cat winks (ding)]
If you don't love exploosion... Exploosions? Exploosions? That sounds gross for some reason. It's not, though. It doesn't mean anything.
Party cloudly with 70... [laughs] ahh... I am 12 years old. Partly cloudy with 78... [laughs] I rarely make myself laugh. Partly clou... [laughs] [Prepares to do it again. Laughs before he even begins.] Why is this funny? This isn't funny. Ohhh. Partly cloudy with 78 percent chance of [raspberry]. See? That's not even that funny.

Recurring elements

singing rug, beardlovers, Explosion Wednesday, headlines, clone, Craig with a Wig, merchandise, doobly-doo, flying-words sob, wink, outtakes

Related videos

The clip of Craig with a Wig is from Success!.


Three-dimensional words Wheezy Waiter fly in from left of screen, land on floor, and then the word "Waiter" topples over as outro theme plays.
Outro video by thedankez
Outro music by SyllixMusic
Outro singing by darbylud

External links

Someone is Missing on YouTube