|Original Upload date||June 4, 2012|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||—|
Transcript (in progress)
Hey beardlovers. So... remember a little while ago when I stood up and said I was going to stand up in my videos? Well, I tried that. I don't think it's worked out. I think I'm gonna sit back down. Sometimes you have to fail to succeed, you know?
Except in my case 'cause I always win 'cause I am awesome.
Plus I already won standing up so I don't really need to do it anymore and the doctor says I have bad knees, and my dog ate it.
So here we go, folks. From now on, I'm sitting down in my videos.
Oh crap! There's no chair!
Going down, going down. Start the intro. Start the intro!
Okay, this is bad. Okay.
Oh boy. This isn't good.
I do however enjoy the gentle breeze on my buttocks as I sway through the afternoon air... but focus!
Okay. Is there something to grab onto? Eagle, come here! That's right. Come here. Come here. Boom! Haha! Okay. Is there something to grab onto?
It's time like this that your life flashes before your eyes. That's all I have now. Before the end times. Memories. I can hold onto memories.
Augh! They're just figurative!
I got it!
Hey, clone! Grab a chair!
- Which one? Where? Over there?
- I don't care. Any chair.
- What if there is a bear?
- There is no bear. Just grab a chair.
- Shall I dare? I'll sit and stare.
- I do not like it when you stare. Grow a pair and grab a chair!
- Come on. Come on come on come on.
- Got it! Right here.
- Hurry! Okay, good. It's reserved. That's rude. Put it back. Someone's sitting there.
Clone, hurry! There's no chair here. There needs to be a chair right here.
- Here you go.
- That's from the No Sitting section. That's illegal.
- Here you go.
- Okay, good. That's a family heirloom. Don't you care about your ancestors?
- Here. Here you go.
- That chair is just in your head.
- What? What the...?
- Come on come on come on. Come on come on.
- And here you go.
- That chair's racist! Insensitive.
- Okay. Here it is. Here it is.
- Hurry! Hurry! Okay, good. Craig with a Wig's in that one.
- Why am I not in the kitchen?
- Oh. I thought it was heavy.
- Come on. Come on come on come on come on. Oh, too late! Nooooooooooooo!
It was all a dream. Of course it was. Why would I own a racist chair? I always make sure all my chairs aren't racist. It looks like this camera's zoomed in. Oh my god! I'm still mid-fall. How did I fall asleep mid-fall? Normally it's harder for me to fall asleep! Whoaaaaa!
The chair was here the whole time. Huh.
Except I might still be dreaming because I have a dinosaur claw for a hand! Aaaaaaa! Oh, that's right. I had it surgically attached. This isn't a dream at all. Why did I do that?
Ow! Oh. So I wouldn't pick my nose.
Check it out, beardlovers. I got new lights so now I'm dramatically backlit. Except there's a tripod in the shot. How do I cover that up? Now it's a coat rack. See? No one will ever know the difference. Hehehe. Or I could zoom.
So beardlovers, do you like habitats? Do you like humanity? Do you like the word for?
Not the number! And not the word that means the front or like foreground, forehead.
F-o-r. It doesn't matter!
Doing a fundraiser for Habitat for Humanity right now. We're trying to get to ten thousand dollars. We're at 2500 dollars right now. Follow the link in the doobly-doo. Please donate. If you can't donate, that's fine. The next best thing would be to tweet about it or Facebook it or Tumblr it or Google Plus it or Pinterest it or Geocities it.
That is all for now. But there's lots more in the future. As well as the past.
Don't worry. Lighting will not be like this all the time. It'll be like this!
I think I'm getting a tan.
Sit Down on YouTube