Segway Tour (Ford Fiesta Mission 2)
|"Segway Tour (Ford Fiesta Mission 2)"|
|Original Upload date||July 3, 2009|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||WheezyWaiter|
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[Title on screen: Ford Fiesta Mission #2]
[Craig on phone:] Hey Matt. Remember that segway tour that we tried to go on a couple weeks ago but it was rained out? Let's try it again today. But you better bundle up. It's really bad out there again.
[Matt exits his doorway in a coat and opens an umbrella. Walks down steps. Looks around at a bright, sunny street.]
[Matt:] *ding*ing *ding*hole.
[Craig, in car:] Did you bring any sunscreen?
[Matt:] Yeah, I've got two flavors. SPF 15 for your face. SPF 45 for your *ding*.
[Craig:] Oh, I'll take the SPF 45.
[Craig outside the car, filming it in its parking space:] Bye Fiesta! [takes off half-running] Segway segway segway segway segway segway segway segway segway segway segway!
[Matt watches Craig, shakes his head:] I hate that man.
[Matt and Craig run down sidewalk in downtown Chicago.]
[Craig:] We're gonna be late. How's it feel?
[Matt:] Feels good. Working that cardio.
[sign for City Segway Tours]
[Craig and Matt watch a safety video, reacting in horror as the stick figures in the video fall from the segway.]
[Safety video:] Aggressive leaning forward or pushing the handlebar forward leading to a fall and the potential for serious injury. Loose objects and materials or steep slopes can cause the segway PT to lose traction. You will trip if the Segway PT's wheel or powerbase encounters an obstacle... [Craig throws up in his mouth as another stick figure falls] [Matt covers his eyes] ... that interferes with the Segway PT's wheels, potentially causing a fall.
[Matt on a segway, in a helmet, listening to instructions.] [Craig riding a segway.]
[Matt:] Hey Craig, whaddya think about these new motorized horses?
[Craig turns in circles in the segway]
[Matt:] Now I know how Gizmo Duck feels. [makes a sound as he rolls away]
[Craig on segway in front of a statue:] Statue! [Craig points to sidewalk:] Sidewalk. [Riding over a bridge.] Bridge. [Riding through a tunnel.] Tunnel. One leg! [Craig lifts his foot briefly.]
[Matt:] Yeah? Woo!
[More footage of Craig on the segway]
[Craig sings the theme to Jurassic Park as he rides past a statue of a dinosaur.]
Kinda tired. Just did some high-speed standing for, like, two miles. Takin' a break.
I'm going backwards, aren't I? [Craig asks as he rolls backwards]
[Craig holds camera, shooting himself riding segway, can see other segways in the background.] I'm winning.
[Craig shooting Matt:] You look pretty good with a planetarium behind you.
[Matt:] I know. [puts his hand on his chin in a thoughtful pose. then points at camera. then rides off.]
[Scenic shot of downtown skyline. Craig rides through the shot on his segway eating a hotdog]
[Craig shooting Matt:] You look pretty good with a fountain behind you.
[Matt:] Yeah? [puts hand on chin. then points at camera.] Stay in school. [rides out of frame]
[Matt on the phone on his segway:] I know... Michigan...
[Craig:] Who you talking to? Your mom?
[Matt:] Talking to your mom.
[Music plays and voiceover begins over footage of Craig spinning on his segway] We learned a lot that day. About ourselves. About our country. [Craig salutes in front of a line of flags and rides off] And about hot dogs. [Craig eating a hot dog. He winks (ding)]
[wheezywaiter.com youtube.com/wheezywaiter outro with music playing instead of outro theme]
[Some people are setting up a green screen]
[Matt:] Yeah, it's recording.
[Craig rides his segway in front of the green screen, which is now an image of the earth from space. Matt zooms the camera in, so Craig appears to be on his segway in space. He rides off. Zooming sound.]
The first and failed attempt at this mission is documented in the video Segway?.
Segway Tour (Ford Fiesta Mission 2) on YouTube