|Original Upload date||February 24, 2011|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||jprod64|
[slides in/singing rug]
Hey beardlovers. Do you like water?
Particularly when people drink it?
[pauses] [answers less enthusiastically] Useful. They're useful.
[quietly] Willing to give it a try.
Well that's wonderful because the core demographic of this video are people who love water, the environment, appreciate home appliances, and are willing to give line dancing a try.
What about maple syrup?
Did I say maple syrup?
Why'd you say it?
I don't know. Perhaps because I had waffles today.
What flavor were they?
That's my favorite too.
That's because we're the same person.
We are? [angle widens to match the other angle] We are! [speaks the way the guy in the original angle spoke:] See! I told you so.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
So the other day I had a lovely phone conversation with this guy [picture of Alan], Alan Lastufka, co-founder of DFTBA Records and generally awesome dude.
He calls me up. He's like, Hey 'sup? And I'm like, Hey, just finishing putting the cream on my planters wart on my foot. And he's like, whoa TMI, dude. And I'm like, you asked. And he's like, that's really gross. And I'm like, actually 7 to 10 percent of the US has them. It's very common. And he's like, we're getting off topic. And I'm like, uh, we were never on topic. And then he says, GE wants you to do a video. Anyway, to make a long story actually have a purpose, I'm getting in step with Ecomagination. Still don't know what I'm talking about? Let me explizzain. That's street talk for 'explain.' I'm hip. Hizzip.
Ecomagination is this initiative created by GE to help meet demands for cleaner air, cleaner water, efficiency, all that good stuff. I need a cleaner bathroom but I guess I gotta do that myself. One of the things they're doing to promote this is the Ecomagination line dance. Basically they want to create the world's longest wedding reception. That's where line dances happen, right? And there's a contest. All you gotta do is learn the dance, download the song, make a video and submit it. I won't be competing but I will be doing my own awe-inspiring, compelling, heart-wrenching version of the line dance as an example. Go to youtube dot com slash ecomagination to see examples of other videos. Winner of the contest gets an Ecomagination home appliance makeover. If that prize doesn't appeal to you because you suffer from the condition known as adolescent or dorm inhabitant, just know that GE's working with Charity Water and your video will help them donate clean, safe drinking water to those that need it.
Now, to be honest, I'm not much of a line dancer. And this may be the first time that my parents actually like the music I put in my video. And so might Aunt Judy. This is my first compromise on our way to peaceful relations. Aunt Judy!! Okay, enough procrastinating. I'm gonna try out this line dance thing. Fairly certain I'm not going to like it at first, but then, as the movement gradually works its way into my jaded heart, I will slowly start to understand the joy and freedom that line dancing brings. Eventually overcome and swept away in the moment, I will walk away a changed man. A little skip in my step, a little ripple in the pool of my thoughts. I'm still procrastinating.
[Music plays. Craig begins the dance. After about ten seconds, he reacts in surprise when one of his shoes turns into a cowboy boot while dancing. Then the other foot has a cowboy boot on it too. He continues dancing. Suddenly he's wearing a Western-style shirt. Then a cowboy hat. He finishes the dance and walks up the camera.]
[speaking in a thick Western-style accent:] I don't think it affected me too much like. Well, see you a little bit later on down the trail, I reckon. [does a dance step as he walks away]
[Viewer-submitted wink (ding)]
[Outro music plays over a piece of knitting that says 'Wheezy Waiter']
[Outtakes:] Yes!!!! Yes!!!! My favorite!!!! That's my favorite!!! Oh yeah!!!! Oh yeah!!!! [clears throat] Yeah.
explizzain = street talk for 'explain'
hizzip = street talk for 'hip'
Line Dance? on YouTube