Juggle Boogie

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"Juggle Boogie"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 321
Original Upload date May 28, 2010
Running time 0:02:52
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Outro sunglasses outro
Wink submitted by JasonRister1
Great People
Guests: Mike Benedetto
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Sexiest Channel on Youtube"
Next →
"Deep Dark Secret Hot Dog Rain Dance"



[slides in/singing rug]
Hey beardlovers. You wanna know what I think? No? Fine! I'm going over here. [slides outs/singing rug] That's one less thought for you.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[slides in/singing rug] So I'm coming back. But I"m not telling you that thought I had earlier.
If you're new to my channel or old to my channel, you might be wondering, What does this guy do? What's his thing? What's his gimmick? What's the gimmick this guy does that's his thing? Well, it's juggling.
[Stands in front of the kitchen doorway, juggling.]
That's right. I juggle. That's my thing. I'm like a faucet of juggling. Just turn it on, fill up your cup, and drink in the... That's a terrible metaphor. [text on screen: simile] I also like to sing while I juggle.
[Music starts as we see Craig juggling from a bunch of different angles]
I juggle while I sing
And I sing while I juggle
Then I like to lay in bed and snuggle [Lies down, puts his head on pillow]
With you. [points at camera]
By you, I mean pillow,
I didn't mean you. [Gets up]
Don't be such a dilhole,
That's not how we do.
Who wants to be a snuggler with a juggler with a balding hairdo?
[walking outside] When I'm outside, it's a juggle-o-rama
But not right now cause I'm holding up the camera.
[back inside] When I'm inside, I juggle in my booties [lifts up foot, which is in cowboy boot]
Sometimes I like to watch scary movies [sitting in chair, he covers his eyes in fright, peeks out]
That's a lot of fun.
Juggle with a baseball [holds up pink baseball to camera]
Or mild curry paste ball [holds up bottle of mild curry paste]
Juggle with a lime [holds up lime]
Or juggle with a different lime [more juggling footage, which has been intercut throughout the song]
Juggle with a party whistle [blows party whistle]
Juggle with John Entwhistle [Taps John Entwhistle in a photo of The Who]
Juggle with a blank stare [He does that]
Or The Man Who Wasn't There [holds up DVD]
Juggle with a little jig [does a little jig while juggling]
Or even Craig with a Wig [juggles in front of Craig with a Wig]
Juggle in a deep fog [He's barely visible through fog]
Juggle as a hot dog. [Juggling in a hot dog costume]
Juggle with a bad lithp.
Juggle with a giant fist. [Holds up the giant fist]
Juggle with the rock king [Holds up DVD of the movie Elvis]
Juggle with nothing. [Juggles with nothing]
It's really easy to juggle with nothing.
You probably can't do it though.
I'm super talented.
[turns to alternate camera angle]
Yeah, while others be strugglin', I be jugglin'.
[turns to main camera angle]
I've juggled more balls than Fruit of a Loom.
[turns to alternate camera angle]
Well, actually, Fruit of the Loom holds 'em in place but
[turns to main camera angle]
You know what I mean. Peace.
[Walking outside, Craig tries to juggle with one hand while holding camera with the other. Shakes his head.]
[Song over]
Juggling. That's what I'm about. Oh *shirt* it's Free Bagel Friday, first HD edition. I'm gonna go put on something more bland.
[Craig's boss walks up to bagels, singing to himself. Craig walks up.]
[Craig:] Gimme that bagel.
[Craig's boss turns to him.]
[Craig:] Whoa! [looking around] Everything's so clear.
[Craig's boss:] Yeah. [Moves his hands around and watches them.]
[Craig:] You're my boss?
[Craig's boss:] You have a beard?
[Craig:] Oh you know I have a beard. [Punches his boss, who flies up in the air and flips over the recycling bin as he falls to the floor.]
[Craig's boss, lying on the floor, looks at his reflection in an aluminum container:] I'm a Caucasian?
[Viewer sits down with waffles and coffee.] There. I've got my coffee and my Eggo waffle. Oh *shirt* it's Free Bagel Friday. [Cuts a round hole in the middle of his waffle.] There. Bagel Eggo waffle. [Goes to eat it. As crunch sound happens, it disappears. Viewer winks (ding)]
[Wheezy Waiter sunglasses outro]
[Craig stands near kitchen door, juggling.] That's right. I juggle. That's my thing. I'm like a... [one of the objects falls on the ground] terrible juggler.
[Craig stands in a hot dog suit and waves at camera:] I'm delicious. Goodbye!

Recurring elements

singing rug, beardlovers, song, Craig with a Wig, alternate camera angle, *shirt*, Free Bagel Friday, wink, outtakes, hot dog suit

External links

Juggle Boogie on YouTube