[slides in/singing rug]
[singing] Aaahooohh, what's love got to do with it, got to do with it? What's love but a secondhand emotion? What's love got to do with it, got to do with it? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?
[song] He's Craigity Craig, Craig with a Tina Turner wig. Woooooow.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
Hey beardlovers. Today I'm feeling sick. Lovesick. I'm loving eternally. [Coughs up hearts]
So why am I lovesick? Because I'm in love. What am I in love with? Why would you ask "what" I'm in love with? You're sick. But in this case, it would make sense because I'm in love with a thing. I'm in love with Valentines Day. That's right. The actual day.
What's Valentines Day? Why do you have so many questions? I'm not gonna answer it. Alright, you twisted my arm. I'll answer it. Valentines Day is an annual celebration celebrating love and affection between intimate companions.
[Quoting from Wikipedia] "The day is named after one or more early Christian martyrs, Saint Valentine" ... Wait... "one or more?" [Quoting from Wikipedia again and talking in a funny voice] "The Valentines honored on February 14 are Valentine of Rome and Valentine of Terni." Sorry, I assume everyone before the 1500s talked like a wizard.
"The Catholic Encyclopedia also speaks of a third saint named Valentine. He was martyred in Africa with a number of companions, but nothing more is known about him."
Wow, kind of makes you think if that whole martyr thing was worth it. "I shall be martyred in Africa. And some day they will speak of me in one sentence on Wikipedia." "Don't forget about us companions!" "Yes, and my companions."
The first recorded association of Valentines Day with romantic love is in Parlement of Foules by Geoffrey Chaucer. [talks funny] "For there was on seynt Volantynys day when every bird cometh there to chase his make." I ... I don't...
I read more about Valentines Day and it seems like its origins are a big mystery, which makes me love it more. Mystery makes the heart go bonkers. You can quote me on that. [Text appears on the screen: Mystery makes the heart go bonkers. -Craig Benzine]
I love you, Valentines Day, for so many reasons. You don't care that I wear my vlogbrothers shirts inside out or when I eat the potato salad straight from the container. Mmmm. Whenever we curl up to watch something, it always lets me decide what to watch, which is always Wheezy Waiter videos or Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights or re-runs of Kate & Allie. I have ALL the DVDs. Who doesn't?
Oh that's right. I bought Valentines Day some gifts. Hey Valentines Day [goes to the window]. I got you a bag of cookies... uh... cookie. I ate the other ones. Here you go. Here you go. Ahh. [Drops cookie out the window. It falls on the sidewalk.] Yum yum. Come here. Give me a kiss. [Craig leans out the window, his arms outstretched for a hug.] Give me a kiss. Aaaaah. [Craig falls onto the sidewalk.] Oof. Oh, your cookie. [Craig starts eating the cookie.] Yeah, this was in your mouth but I don't care. That's what true love's all about. Now I shall dance with the day. [Craig throws cookie to the ground and starts dancing.] Alright, slow dance. That's right, day.
[Cynthia walks up and speaks.] Oh hey Craig, happy Valentines D...
Too bad, female! I'm taken. [Craig pushes her face away with his hand.] Can't you see the day?
[Wheezy Waiter video game outro]
[outtakes] [singing] What's love got to do with it, got to do with it? What's love but a secondhand emotion? What's love got to dwith it, got to do with it? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?
singing rug, song, beardlovers, Wikipedia, Craig quotes, wink, outtakes
For the Love of Day on YouTube