E Pluribus Football

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"E Pluribus Football"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 249
Original Upload date February 8, 2010
Running time 0:02:19
Intro Wheezy beard intro
Outro Sunglasses outro
Wink submitted by DarthJader11
Featured Clones
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Tuft Luck"
Next →



[slides in/singing rug]
Hey beardlovers. I'm American, and I love football. [holds up pink baseball] I'm holding a pink baseball, aren't I? That's right. I don't own a football. I guess if you love something, set it free. Or don't own it. That's the moral of this intro. Intros gotta have morals, right?
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
If you live in the U.S., last night was a very big event for our people. The Super Bowl. And the New Orleans Saints won their first one ever.
If you live in Grenada, happy Independence Day yesterday. Ever conscious of God we, [holds up his hands like parentheses] you people of Granada... that's parentheses... aspire, build, and advance as one people. That's their motto. Thank you, Wikipedia.
If you live in any other country, [blows raspberry]. Got nothing. Happy Sunday night?
What's the motto for the U.S.? [looks offscreen] Oh yeah, e pluribus unum. Out of many one.
Americans, we should say that more often to keep it fresh in our minds.
[Craig and a clone sit side by side.]
[Craig:] Check it out. For lunch, I'm about to combine bread, mayo, and meat.
[Clone:] E pluribus unum, bro.
[Craig:] Hey-o!
[They high five]
[Clone:] I love America.
[Craig:] I love sandwiches.
Wait a second! I think the coffee's done! I also love it when the coffee's done! [throws pink baseball, like for a football pass, runs to catch it, lots of shots of the ball in air, of Craig running to catch it, before he catches it near the kitchen door. He walks into kitchen and hears thumping music.]
[Craig:] Oh, you're kidding me! Wait... [looks around at his empty kitchen] the party's over. Where's that music coming from?
[Craig with a Wig is sitting at kitchen table, swaying his head to music a little. He notices Craig. The music stops.]
[Craig with a Wig:] Oh, that was just me humming.
[Craig:] That was humming? You're really good at humming.
[Craig with a Wig:] Yeah. And I hate it.
[Theme song:] He's Craigity Craig, Craig with a Wig. [Craig with a Wig smiles] [toy piano key]
[Craig comes back from kitchen with his coffee. Takes a sip.] Mmm. Thousands of grains of coffee beans. One cup. E pluribus yummy.
Out of many. [turns to alternate camera angle] [turns back to main camera angle] Yummy.
[Viewer-submitted wink (ding)]
[Wheezy Waiter sunglasses outro]
[outtakes:] [Craig is running and looking up in the air. He jumps mid-run. Craig twirls mid-run. Shot of pink baseball flying through air.]

Recurring elements

singing rug, beardlovers, Wikipedia, clone, "I love it when the coffee's done!", kitchen party, Craig with a Wig, alternate camera angle, wink, outtakes

Related videos

In this video, Craig pronounces "Grenada" gra-nah-da. This is important for the following day's video Stupid.

External links

E Pluribus Football on YouTube