Ding in Space
|"Ding in Space"|
|Original Upload date||November 16, 2009|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Wink submitted by||matrix626|
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[slides in/singing rug]
[buttoning up shirt] Thought I'd put on a nice respectable shirt. Cause... I don't know... it's Monday. I don't know why.
I think it might be because of Murphy Brown. That was on Mondays when I was a wee one. A boy. Not a midget or a dwarf. And Murphy Brown dressed up in nice suits. Why would I want to model myself after Murphy Brown? There's so much about me that's a mystery to me.
I wonder what Candice Bergen's doing these days. Candice Bergen or Berjen. I'm gonna look it up on the internet. [leans out of frame. leans back into frame.] Oh! Looks like she was in a movie called Bride Wars. Might have to check that one out never. [smiles]
I don't know. Maybe Bride Wars is your thing. If it is, you're probably a teenage girl. And judging by the YouTube demographic, it's very likely you're a teenage girl. There's nothing wrong with being a teenage girl. Never thought I would say that to thousands of people.
You know what? It's been so long. What was the plot of Murphy Brown? Let's see what IMDB says.
[reading something offscreen] The misadventures of a tough female television journalist and her friends.
Misadventures. What exactly does the word "misadventures" mean? Let's look that up on the internet too!
[reading something offscreen] An instance of misfortune, a mishap.
Oh yes, I remember a lot of mishaps on that show. Like the time Murphy got preggers with a baby daddy! According to Urban Dictionary, a "baby daddy" is a father that is neither a husband or a boyfriend. And yes, I have a band-aid. [points to finger with band-aid] If you followed me on Twitter, you'd know why. Link in the doobly-doo. [points the wrong way to the doobly-doo. Text on screen: 'That way' with an arrow]
And then in real life Dan Quayle got really mad about that storyline on the show, I remember. Murphy, raising a child without a father? You bitch!
Ah the good old days when politicians cared about stuff on the TV. Now there's so much media, you can get away with anything. I could say things like: "You bitch!" Or "Kids without fathers is cool. And so is beer." [takes a sip of beer] [whispers:] Get drunk! [Drinks beer] Mmmmm. All this beer makes me gotta go pee. [turns to get up] Oh! Just had a misadventure in my pants.
As far as I know, not as many people talk about violence in the media anymore either. Does it really have any effect? [Craig and a clone sit side by side.] [Craig punches the clone.]
[Craig, to camera:] How did that make you feel?
[Craig:] Not you. Them. [points to camera]
There could even be a web series that safely exists right now online that's sort of a takeoff of Lost in Space but it's called *Ding*ed in Space. And instead of a hyperdrive, they have a sex drive. Uh... hey, you know what? My friends made that series, and I'm actually in it. And the first episode was uploaded today.
[Craig is standing now.] You know what? You should probably just click right here and you can go watch the first episode and then you should probably subscribe to that channel. [An annotation appears between Craig's outstretched arms. Craig extends one bent leg behind him and smiles, holding the pose for a few moments.]
There's some adult themes. If you're watching this with a little kid, you probably shouldn't watch that. Then again, I don't want to tell you how to be a parent. Who am I? Dan Quayle? [laughs] Bringing it back. Bringing it back. Woo! Dated jokes.
Alright, it's time for a wink. I think I'm gonna go with a teenage girl this time.
[The winker is a little girl:] Hi Wheezy. Here's a wink. [wink (ding)]
Actually that's a bit younger than a teenage girl. She probably shouldn't watch *Ding*ed in Space.
[Wheezy Waiter sunglasses outro. Still misspelled.]
Oh! Looks like she was just in a movie called Bride Wars. Might have to check that one out [blows a seven-second raspberry]
You know what? You should probably just click right here and you can go watch the first episode and then you should probably subscribe to that channel. [An annotation appears between Craig's outstretched arms. Craig extends one bent leg behind him and smiles, holding the pose for a few moments.]
On YouTube, this video is entitled *Ding* in Space, but the Wheezy Wiki won't allow this page to be titled that.
Ding in Space on YouTube