[slides in/singing rug]
Joke punchline [rim shot] [audience laughs] [Craig puts on round sunglasses. Holds up Homer Simpson doll. Audience laughs and applauds. Craig pours water over his head. Audience claps. Craig puts on sailor hat.]
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
[singing rug sound. Craig puts down Homer Simpson doll, takes off hat and glasses.] Sometimes I do things.
One thing I like to do is check out other people's YouTube channels just to see what you guys got going on. There's one channel in particular that's very similar to mine that has around the same subscribers as I do. I thought, I'll put him in a video. Here they are.
[Text on screen: youtube.com/ytitty] [Clip of a YouTube video in which there's a guy speaking in German]
[Craig looks like he wants to respond but closes his mouth and just listens instead, with a furrowed brow.]
[The guy takes a sip of beer and continues speaking in German. Craig is befuddled. The guy is talking about beer.]
[Craig:] Beer? Yeah, I like beer.
[More of the guy speaking German]
Okay. Maybe I didn't actually watch that channel yet. [turns head and looks offscreen] Could someone tell my YouTube reviewers I don't speak German? Or Russian or Prussian or Flussian or whatever language that was. I don't even speak English that will. Well. Wall?
A few weeks ago, I asked you to send me in some Wheezy Waiter outro songs, and I would pick one to be the new Wheezy Waiter outro song. Well, I can't pick one. So I narrowed it down to some of my top favorites. But my real favorite is all of them. But I can't use all of them cause that would be really long and people have things to do. Like cleaning and bowling. [turns to alternate camera angle] I don't know what you do. [turns back to main camera angle] So I put a poll on wheezywaiter dot com. You can go vote on the final nominees for the new Wheezy Waiter outro. If you would, if you'd do that, that'd be... that'd be really cool. [Text on screen: youtube/pogobat reference]
Alright. What should I do today? I guess I could, uh, tell you my deepest darkest secret? [A clickable annotation appears on screen; Deep Dark Secret] Or I could dance around in the rain in a hot dog suit. [Another clickable annotation appears on the screen: Hot Dog Rain Dance] Which one should I do?
Better click on one of them, though. Let's cue some click music. Nothing I like more while I'm clicking than some music. [Heavy metal music plays.] Whoa, that's too intense. Simmer it down a little bit. [Mellow music plays] That's too mellow. Okay, midsies. [Driftless Pony Club music plays.] That's... that's nice. Are you gonna click one? You better click one or I'm gonna drink this human poison. [Picks up cup] Better click one or I'm gonna die. Fine! [Annotations disappear as Craig drinks the contents of the cup.] Mmm. [Starts choking, grabs his throat, collapses in his chair.] Super dead. [Goes back to collapsed position.]
[Viewer-submitted wink (ding)]
[Wheezy Waiter sunglasses outro]
[Two clickable annotations reappear on screen: Hot Dog Rain Dance and Deep Dark Secret]
singing rug, laugh track, alternate camera angle, interactive video, Driftless Pony Club (DPC), wink
Deep Dark Secret Hot Dog Rain Dance on YouTube