[Wheezy Waiter beard intro with 'Wheezy Waiter clip' song]
Hey. Good morning. [takes sip of coffee] It's a beautiful morning. Birds are chirping. Sun is shining. [whispers:] Help me.
Yeah, everything's good.
Today is the first day of my morning videos. Which means I get the opportunity to get up way earlier than I'm used to and eat breakfast. [whispers:] Kill me.
Today's breakfast is black eyed peanut butter and toast.
Know how to make black eyed peanut butter and toast? It's just like regular peanut butter and toast to the soundtrack of the Black Eyed Peas.
[To the tune of "My Humps" by the Black Eyed Peas, Craig rotates a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter in front of camera, takes out two pieces of bread, shows them to camera, puts them in the toaster, shows the peanut butter to the camera, dances, licks peanut butter off a knife, dances, pours more coffee, drinks coffee, dances, takes toast out of toaster, spreads peanut butter on toast, takes a bite and chews in slow motion]
[takes a bite] Mmm. Mmm. So that's black eyed peanut butter and toast. My recipe calls for wheat bread, organic peanut butter, and the song "My Lovely Lady Lumps," but you can use whatever peanut butter or Black Eyed Peas song as you'd like.
Hey commenters, what type of peanut butter do you like?
[takes another bite] Mmm. Mmm.
I'd love to stick around and chat but now I have to get ready for work. Yeah, getting up early's not as bad as you'd think. [whispers:] Shoot me in the head.
Here's a wink sent all the way to me from Europe. Are you ready, Gelato?
[Title: your eyelids (or your pet's) can ding too!]
[Title: send me some winks.]
[Title: contact info and other wonderful things at:]
breakfast puns, wink
Breakfast 1: Black Eyed Peanut Butter and Toast on YouTube