Beards on the Run 5 - Strong Arm
|"Beards on the Run 5 - Strong Arm"|
|Original Upload date||March 13, 2011|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Outro||video game outro|
|Wink submitted by||QuanelleShow|
audiences in Houston, Dallas, and Nashville
[Sam running down a walkway with big columns. Looks around. Stops suddenly. Shot of building from outside. It's the Parthenon.] Crap. I'm in Greece.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
Hey beardlovers. Welcome to the fifth tour video. I had a lot of fun in Houston.
[Jeff:] We had some good tacos there.
[Title on screen: Houston, TX. Shot of audience waving and wooing.]
Also a great time in Dallas.
[Jeff:] Good onion rings.
[Title on screen: Dallas, TX. Shot of audience waving and wooing.]
And two nights ago, we were in Nashville.
[Jeff:] Good cheese flautas.
[Title on screen: Nashville, TN. Shot of audience waving and wooing.]
Tonight we're playing in Columbus, Ohio at Bernie's Distillery and tomorrow night at Pittsburgh Distillery [can hear Matt laughing and Craig smiles] in Pennsylvania, Garfield Artworks. The description is over there. Somewhere.
I'm really excited we have a day off today [title over his mouth: yesterday] because I get to do laundry. And I'm ... really stinky.
Hey bum, what are you doing for your day off?
[Driver guy:] I'm gonna destroy something beautiful.
Hey Juniper, what are you gonna do?
[Jeff:] It's Jeff. And I'm gonna...
Hey Matt, what are you doing?
[Matt:] I'm gonna get my arm back into shape and length.
[The Driftless Pony Club song "Inspectors of Inspectors" plays over the following footage. Matt, still with only his hand, his wrist, and a little bit of forearm protruding from his sleeve, ties his shoes and puts a shirt over his hair. The driver guy enters "beauty" into the GPS. Matt draws his plan on the chalkboard.]
[Driver guy, pointing out window:] Ahh, look at that. That's beautiful.
[Matt curls weights with his tiny arm. He drives a tiny tricycle. He dribbles a basketball, first with his regular arm and then his tiny arm. He exercises his arms on the treadmill. His tiny arm appears to be hurting but he keeps going. He does some leg raises on a weight machine. He jumps rope but with his tiny arm only gets a few jumps in before throwing the jumprope in frustration.]
[Driver guy:] Oh look at that beautiful herd of steer over there. [picture of five buffalo]
[Matt on the small tricycle again. Sees a small bicycle and rides it with glee. Matt holds onto a bar with his tiny arm while Craig pulls him from behind a few times. Matt cries out. They take a break, panting heavily from the exertion. Matt attempts a few push-ups but with his tiny arm falls over before completing them each time. The driver guy laughs maniacally. Shot of a van hitting the buffalo. Driver guy laughs. Matt on the very small bicycle rides up to a larger bicycle and rides that one.]
[Matt, holding his tiny arm:] I want you to be big! You can be bigger!
[As Matt holds onto a bar, Wheezy pulls from behind and Matt cries out. As he yells, his full arm extends from his sleeve. Matt and Craig celebrate, jumping up and down with their regular-sized arms raised above them in victory. Matt does push-ups, clapping while doing them. He dribbles the basketball artfully. He exercises his full arms on the treadmill. He jumps rope with high jumps a few times before throwing the rope over his shoulder.]
[One winker raps while the other beat boxes:] So who the man with the beard and the plan rocking out with the jams for the YouTube fans? Do... do me greater. It's Whee... Wheezy Waiter, Until next time, peace, peace, see you later. [They wink (ding)]
[Sam runs into a McDonalds. Runs out a second later with an ice cream cone. Runs up to the driver guy, who's leaning against the wall, enjoying his own ice cream cone.]
[Sam:] Oh hey! It's the driving bum. How you doing, man? You driving all the way?
[The driver guy grabs Sam's ice cream cone and hurls it onto the pavement. He pushes Sam in the chest and walks away. Sam stares down at the cone, bereft. Then turns and runs away.]
Matt having a tiny arm is a reference to the previous video, Beards on the Run 4 - The Cliff.
Beards on the Run 5 - Strong Arm on YouTube