|Original Upload date||November 17, 2010|
|Intro||Wheezy beard intro|
|Outro||video game outro|
|Wink submitted by||Corey Vidal|
crowd from Toronto gathering
[slides in/white background/singing rug is Celine Dion music]
Hey beardlovers. I suppose you're wondering why the ground is playing Celine Dion. [Slides again/Celine Dion music] [slides again/Celine Dion music] Well, I'm in Canada! Canada. CanaDAD. CanaNANDA. Canada. Not sure if it's a thing yet.
[Wheezy Waiter beard intro]
Anyway, Celine Dion, not that I pay much attention at all, is from Canada. She was born in Charlemagne, Quebec and as she grew up, she emerged as a teen star in the French-speaking world and then after the release of her album Unison, she became a superstar in North America and all parts of the world that speak English.
I don't know all that stuff about her. I just looked it up. I don't even listen to her music at all. That's just the way it is. [sings:] That's the way it is.
Sometimes when I travel I get lonely, so on my way to Canada, I brought a friend. [Boing sound as a zit on Craig's face is highlighted]
So you may be asking... [Speech impediment guy:] Why ah you in Canada Wheezy Waitoe?
First of all, you may need to work on the pronunciation of your Rs, beardlovers. Secondly, remember that rooftop battle I got in with the Canadian on my roof...top... battle? Canadian? And then he returned and we got into a light saber battle? You don't know about that one? Well, that one's linked in the doobly-doo. Well, that was Corey Vidal. You know, the guy who made that four-quadrant John Williams video.
[Craig appears in four different quadrants on the screen, wearing a different t-shirt in each. Sings to the tune of the Raiders of the Lost Ark theme:] This is Corey's. Corey's wall. I'm at Corey's. Corey Vidal's house. O Canada. [Craig in the lower right quadrant is late and sings "O Canada" later than the other three.]
That's linked in the doobly-doo also.
Well, I came to Canada to apologize. Corey, could you come here for a second?
[Corey slides in/Celine Dion rug]
[Craig:] I just want to let you know that I'm really sorry about the whole rooftop battle.
[Corey:] Thank you. I'm sorry too. [Corey pronounces "sorry" with a Canadian accent so it sounds like "sore-y." Craig is clearly confused.]
[Craig:] You're... you're what?
[Corey:] Well, I'm sorry about what happened.
[Craig:] You're sore-y? I... [shakes his head] I thought... You told me you were gonna apologize on camera.
[Corey:] Craig, I'm sorry.
[Craig:] Is that... is that like a French word?
[Craig alone on screen again, sighs]
Well, that didn't work out due to language barrier. What should I do now?
[A crowd of people:] I think the coffee's done, eh?
[Crowd of people:] For serious, eh?
I love it when the coffee's done! Thank you random group of strangers in downtown Toronto!
[sits, and sips from Tim Horton's mug.] Mmm. Tim Horton's. Canadian for coffee. Hehehe. [Audience laughs too.] That's a Canadian inside joke. I'm an international traveler. I know things. I'm not afraid to get out, explore. I'm a regular David Thompson... [shows website] arguably the greatest geographer the world has ever known. [Text on screen: and he's from Canada] [shows drawing of him] That's actually not clothes he's wearing. That's what the naked Canadian body looks like. Arguably.
That statement's true because I used the word 'arguably.'
American actor Jason Schwartzmann has three pelvises. [long pause] Arguably.
I'm arguably a 14 year old Japanese geisha [pronounces it gee-sha]. Geisha? [pronounces it gay-sha] The correct pronunciation is arguably geisha. [geesha]
Did you know that the US and Canada share the world's largest border? You know what they say about the countries with the largest border. [smiles and raises his eyebrows a few times, which boing each time.] They're the US and Canada. I implied what I already said.
Did you know that Canada and the US actually fought a war? And the US won. [Corey slides in/Celine Dion rug]
[Corey:] Actually, that war was fought between the United States and Great Britain on the land that would eventually become Canada. And I believe we won that war. [Text on screen: The War of 1812]
[Craig:] That's bullcrap.
[Corey:] Remember the Battle of Queenston Heights and your troops and militias surrendered to the British forces...
[Craig:] That... ah... strategic retreat. That was.. that battle wasn't worth it. It was too cold.
[Corey:] No, and then there was the time where our forces made it down to what is now known as the White House and burned down the presidential mansion.
[Craig:] Uh... That didn't happen.
[Corey:] Yes it did.
[Craig:] Uh uh.
[Corey:] Yeah, and then everything ended when you guys initiated the treaty of... um... what was that treaty called? Well, you should know. I mean, you initiated...
[Corey:] ... that.
[Craig:] Uh... I... strategically retreat... from this argument. [gets up and walks out of frame.]
[Corey:] Oh. [looks around for a moment] I'm sorry. [Long pause] [Winks (ding)]
[Wheezy Waiter video game outro]
First of all, you may need to work on the pronunciation of your Rs, beardlove... ahhhh... I may... I may need to work on my... the pronunciation of the... the English language.
Well, I came to Canada to apologize. Corey, could you come here for a second? [Corey slides in/Celine Dion rug]
[Craig:] I just wanted to let you know that I'm really sorry about the whole rooftop battle.
[Corey:] You said sorry [sorey]
[Craig:] I said sorey?
[They laugh. Corey slides out/Celine Dion rug]
This is the first appearance of the Craig who talks funny who we'll call Speech impediment guy.
Arguably Canada on YouTube