77. Goal!

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"77. Goal!"
WheezyWaiter video
Episode no. Episode 77
2008
Original Upload date July 30, 2008
Running time 0:02:43
Intro special July intro
Outro wheezywaiter.com outro
Wink submitted by Chase
Episode chronology
← Previous
"Punch Drunk Hate"
Next →
"The Wheezy Knight"

Video

Transcript

[Craig enters the room to a sad theme song by Kyle and Kristen about Bad News Day Wednesday] [Title on the screen: "Wednesday Bad News" by Kyle and Kristin]
[sits down and shrugs as title on the screen reads "The End?" "After 18 episodes in July?"]
[plays a series of clips from his videos in July while the song from Kyle and Kristen continues. See below for list of specific clips. The clips are perfectly matched to the lyrics in the theme song.]
Think I'm coming down with a cold. Can't figure out why that would be.
[Shows clips:] I don't shower on the 4th of July... Hmm. Tastes like salmonella too. [Clip of Wheezy getting a face full of chalk after stomping on the bug made of chalk. More clips:] Uhh, maybe I wouldn't eat it off of a toilet. Yes I would. [stroking the poo sculpture on Shit Fountain]
I guess that's probably why.
Well, I think I know one way to cure it. [Mimes tipping back a bottle/drinking]
Get supplemented!! [holds up a bottle of VItamin C] Yeah!! [tips bottle over to get pills] Oh, it's got one of those things on it. [Rips off the plastic/paper lid thingy at the top of the mouth of the bottle.] Woo! [Drops a pill in his hand, puts it in his mouth it, drinks water, swallows it.] Mm mm mm. Yeah!
I also got some other bad news. It's my last movie in July. I'm unable to make one tomorrow. I apologize. This will end my five-day-a-week schedule. I've gotta say, my favorite part of the whole month was all the winks and the songs and the comments I got. Thank you. I didn't get to all the winks but I'll use them in the future. And keep sending more winks and songs. No more day theme songs, though. Just keep it general.
Now I have a few goals for August. One is to sleep. A lot. Two, I'm going to get through this whole season of The Wire. [holds up the DVDs for season five] That'll probably be done tomorrow. And three, I'm going to try to make at least one movie a week.
What are your goals for August? Please tell me in the comments. I might make a movie out of them. How would I make a movie out of a goal? I don't know. Depends on the goal. Like if your goal is to lose weight, I could make a movie about ... umm... exercise? Is that what it's called? Or if your goal is not to say the word 'like' all the time, I could make a movie about hate. Or if your goal is to take up a new hobby, I could make a movie about punching strangers. That's my hobby.
So I'll see you soon. I'm going to go do absolutely nothing now.
Chase, take it away.
[wink (ding)]
[wheezywaiter dot com outro]
[more clips of July movies] [Craig pulls some dry spaghetti noodles out of a box:] Toodle toodle toodle toodle toodle toodle toodle. If you'd like to wink at the end of one of my movies, send me a picture or a video. Just click the contact button on wheezywaiter dot com [makes farting noise].

Recurring elements

Bad News Wednesday, "Get supplemented!" is a play on "get drunk!", wink, outtakes

Related videos

This video includes many references to the other videos that Craig made in July. In the order of the clips that appear in this video, the clips are:

Intro song montage

spinning chamber of gun: The Magnificent Levin
Wheezy rising up from below frame, very close to camera: 600
A clone rising up behind Wheezy with a razor: Comb on Over
Wheezy with box wine: The Magnificent Levin
Wheezy shaving in his bathroom mirror: Shaving Face
A clone turning into a 12-pack: Good News for People who Love Bidets
Wheezy rubbing his face: Glosstrophobia
Wheezy dousing himself in/drinking foaming beer: Field Reporting
4th of July pickup lines: clip from Ian-dence Day shown in July of 4th The
Wheezy with wine-stained lips: Wall-IMDBEEEEE
Wheezy shirtless/with a scruffed beard: Shaving Face
Wheezy drinking a beer: this is a new clip, shot for this video

Why he's getting sick

"I don't shower on the 4th of July": July of 4th The
"Hmm. Tastes like salmonella too.": The Temple of Ringo
Wheezy getting a face full of chalk: Bug Junk!
"Uhh, maybe I wouldn't eat it off of a toilet. Yes I would.": Jurassic Salsa
Stroking the poo sculpture on Shit Fountain: Good News for People who Love Bidets

Clips after the outro

Toodling the noodles: Bad Noodles
Soliciting winks: The Temple of Ringo

External links

77. Goal! on YouTube